The Famous One
I’m struggling how to start this post. I’ve decided I’m just gonna put it out there.
I want to be famous.
Yeah, I know. So cliche. So corny. So embarrassing.
But it’s true.
Why am I blogging about this?
Well, for some reason my heart is revisiting this issue, so my blog must as well. It did last time, too. Remember this blog?
Yesterday I wrote about the Want-to’s and how kids are unashamed of their wants. The implied message is that adults aren’t. Unashamed, that is. Often the Should’s and Shouldn’t’s shame the dickens out of our Want-to’s.
To openly admit to wanting to be famous is risky, because I’m kind of ashamed of it. All right, all right! Not “kind of”, but “really.”
I’ve been wondering lately what creates this desire in me for fame.
To figure this out, I’ve thought a lot about why fame is so appealing.
In doing so, I have discovered that for me, it’s not just fame. It’s fame and admiration. And love.
I don’t want just to be famous. Many people are famous, but they’re hated. I want to be famous and, well, as Paul put it…”adored.”
Ooh, yuck. More shame.
Why shame? Because you put “famous” with “admired” with “adored” and what do you get? Worship.
I want to be worshipped.
I have a hard time even admitting that one, because then I have to admit that my heart desires for myself what only God should receive. Which means in the secret parts of my dark heart, I want to be God.
It seems so ridiculous when I write it out that way. It actually takes some of the passion out of it. Wanting to be God…so ludicrous.
This Sunday, Paul and I are leading worship for our church. Ironically, one of the songs we’re singing is, “The Famous One”!
Here’s the chorus:
You are the Lord.
The Famous One, famous one.
Great is your name in all the earth.
The heavens declare you’re glorious, glorious!
Great is your fame in all the earth.
Talk about convicting! For what would I have fame? I don’t know. Who would declare me glorious? Not sure.
Creating the earth and everything in it. Now THAT’s something to be famous for!
How about the “heavens” being your fan club, declaring you “glorious!”? Not just people on earth, but the Heavens! THAT is fame.
It makes me laugh, actually, at the thought that I want to be famous the way God is famous. Everyone has heard of God. Some people know Him personally, and some have only heard of His reputation. Some love him. Some hate him. Some people spend their whole lives serving Him. Some spend their whole lives opposing Him. Some people would rather die, hating Him, than surrender to His love.
These things are undeniable about God’s fame.
Why, you ask, does your desire for this kind of fame make you laugh?
Because I would never be able to have that kind of fame.
I couldn’t handle the rejection.
Filed under: General, Catbird, Like a fire, Random Thoughts on April 22nd, 2006
Good (but,convicting) stuff Cath! Thanks for sharing.
I think deep down, most of have that secret desire. I am sure I do, though I do not actually itentify it often. Because it confirms and validates the importance of my gifts and who I am. And that I am adorable. ( I haven’t put it well; in a rush, but know that you are not alone)
I know two girls that adore, love and worship everything you say and do- Jane and Elizabeth. You’re already on your way to being famous.
Very interesting to think about - how our desire to be known and loved (either famously or even just by a few) is a desire for worship. I never thought of it that way. Thanks for putting yourself out there.
Thanks, Stef! Your comment is a great reminder that “fame” is a continuum, not an all-or-nothing thing. Thanks for the comment, and for being here on my blog! I am so pleased!
Rin-your comment, too, is very thought-provoking, and makes me think (as usual) that maybe I’ve carried my thoughts too far. Everyone has the desire to be known and loved…so where’s the line between that as a healthy, normal desire and an unhealthy, dare I say, sinful (at the very least, unbalanced!) desire? I wonder, is there any desire for fame that is acceptable to God?!
Cathy - i just tagged you - see my blog for details. I too wish to be famous…atually an actress on broadway!