Southern Accents, “Please,” and Option “4″
I had to call the Homewood Street and Sanitation Department yesterday to find out the days for our trash pick-up.
Fortunately, they have a automated call system.
You might wonder why I’m pleased to talk to a recorded voice instead of a live human being.
This particular automated system has a local person’s voice recorded to explain the various options.
Imagine the thickest Southern accent you’ve ever heard (except for you Alabama readers…it was a fairly normal for around here), and pair it with the sound of a man who obviously has a genuine desire to be helpful, and this is what you get:
“You have reached the Homewood Street and Sanitation Department, providing garbage and trash collection throughout the city of Homewood. Our normal business hours are Monday through Friday, from 7am to 3:30pm.
Please choose from one of the following options.
For after hours emergencies, please press 1.
For a List of holidays, please press 2.
For trash and garbage misses, please press 3.
For information regarding a lost (pause), stolen (pause), or dead animal, please press 4.”
It took me three tries before I got past “4″ without laughing.
I’m not sure if it was the pauses, the fact that people call enough about lost (pause), stolen (pause) or dead animals enough in Homewood that there is a whole option for it, or the fact that he said “Please” before every single option number.
I love Alabama.
(For the record, if you’re interested in hearing it for yourself, the phone number is 205-942-4028. I’ve got it memorized, should I ever have a need.)
I just hope I don’t ever have to press “4.”
Filed under: General, Catbird, Local Color, Random Thoughts on January 24th, 2007
I went to college in Jacksonville (ALABAMA) and tempd for about a week. One of my jobs was answering the phone for the local sanitation company. And, unfortunately, yes, there were several, “I need sum-bod-ee ta cum scrape this ______ from the road in front ov my house…” calls.
I also love I-20 going into Alabama from Georgia- I know I’m home when I start seeing chicken road kill…
Other amazing perks of the Homewood Street and Sanitation Department:
1. The garbage men will WALK ALL THE WAY UP TO YOUR HOUSE to get your trash cans if you don’t live on the alley. Nothing like running at 6am in the dark and being startled by a garbage man, also wearing headphones, as he comes out from someone’s driveway dragging two giant trash cans 2 blocks ahead of the garbage truck.
2. They have the big claw truck that scoops up trees and limbs. Big hit with the kids.
3. They come and vacuum up your leaves from the curb with the big suction truck in the fall. Also a big hit with the kids.
4. They are always VERY nice and the drivers wave at the kids.
I love Homewood!
are you guys sure you are in still in america :0
Happy to know that you are safely in Alabama and still able to chuckle!
Hugs, Joan
You’re definitely not in Orlando anymore!
As for accents, when Rob and I first got married I worked in retail in Greenville, SC. I had just moved there and the accent was basically foreign to me. One guy, named Bubba (I found out later) came in to the store and asked me a question. I had to ask him to repeat it 3 times before I finally gave up, pointed to the men’s shirts and walked away. I still have no idea what he said, but it makes me laugh every time I think of it.
Glad you have landed into a polite and kind context … but we miss you. Thanks for letting Jane join my class on her last Sunday here.